“Love your neighbor as yourself” (Matthew 22:39).

“Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others” (Philippians 2:3-4).

Does anyone else get a little confused by these commands? We know the first one means love your neighbor well, so does that imply that we should love ourselves well, as well? Yet David writes: “Turn my heart toward your statutes and not toward selfish gain” (Psalm 118:36). Proverbs counsels against selfishness “An unfriendly person pursues selfish ends and against all sound judgment starts quarrels” (Proverbs 18:1), and Paul preaches against selfish ambition in several of his letters. Jesus preached “… to them all: ‘Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross daily and follow me’” (Luke 9:23).

These verses preach a denial of self, but not with an end game of denial. In fact, if we are just trying to see how much we can deny ourselves, we are still engaging in self-ish behavior. The goal is not self-denial. The goal is loving God and loving others.

In fact, there are passages that speak of enjoyment of the gifts Gd has given us. Jesus even says that “the Sabbath was made for man, not man for Sabbath” (Mark 2:27). How do we properly “enjoy” what we have been given? And what are some of the ways that we prioritize our love for God and for others?

1. Gratitude. All good gifts point toward the Giver. James 1:17 reminds us that “Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.” God has made it possible for us to receive gifts of His creation, so we should have a heart of gratitude for His generosity. “Let the message of Christ dwell among you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom through psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit, singing to God with gratitude in your hearts” (Colossians 3:16).
2. Trust. When we trust God for His provision, we realize that we don’t have to be greedy or self-serving. “So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them” (Matthew 6:31-32).
3. Generosity. Generosity is an outcome of gratitude and trust. When we acknowledge that God is the giver of all good gifts and that we can trust Him to provide for each of us, we realize what a blessing it is to be used by Him as a conduit of these good gifts. “The generous will themselves be blessed, for they share their food with the poor” (Proverbs 22:9).
4. Obedience. When we focus on His priorities and align ourselves with His will, everything else falls into place according to His perfect plan. This means not giving in to our sinful desires but instead seeking to please Him in every way. “But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well” (Matthew 6:33).

All these actions are self-less rather than self-ish because they are focused on God and His glory and not on us. And by pursuing them, we can like John the Baptist, seek with our whole hearts to magnify the Lord. “He must become greater; I must become less” (John 3:30).

In Christ,

Judy