“⁴Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.⁵It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking….” 1 Corinthians 13:4-5.

I think there is a reason that these two attributes of what love is not are placed together: love does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking. Here’s what I mean. Have you ever been in a prayer meeting when you hear something like this: “We need to put Brother Joe on the prayer list. I was at his house bringing some food over because you know he got fired and they don’t have any money coming in now.”

What is the intended message? Is it that I want you to know how good I am for bringing food over? Is it that I want you to know Joe must have done something bad at work? It’s really questionable if the intended message was really about needing to display some compassion and help for Joe.

This is similar to the “bless her heart” way that we talk about others, seemingly in a way that makes us look holy but during which we manage to get in some kind of put-down. “Bless her heart, she has never been able to manage those kids.” Sorry, but I think we all see through that one.

The cure is to be sure that our motivations are pure whenever we are talking about anyone. It follows what we talked about in the Chaplain’s Corner last week about boasting and pride. As an attribute of love and therefore a fruit of the spirit, being others-centered requires the ongoing help of the Holy Spirit. We are most like Jesus when our motivation is others-centered rather than self-centered.

In Christ,

Judy