The Chief of Staff at Nashville Rescue Mission has challenged many of us to send a note of gratitude to someone who has influenced our life and to do this daily for the next thirty days.  Here’s mine for today: I would like to thank each of you here at Nashville Rescue Mission who has been courageous and transparent enough to share your story.

I say courageous because I come from a tradition where everyone puts on a show of having it all together, which in retrospect seems rather cowardly. It reminds me of Garrison Keillor who would say as he welcomed listeners to Lake Wobegon, “Welcome to Lake Wobegon, where all the women are strong, all the men are good-looking, and all the children are above average.” Yeah, right!

I can remember from my youth that my mom and grandmother didn’t especially like my uncle (by marriage). I would ask why, but they never let on until much later that it was because they thought he was an alcoholic. That would never have been admitted in my family. I didn’t know until she was in her later stages of life that my mom herself was on antidepressants. It just wasn’t discussed. I remember a teenage friend from church who went to “live for a year with her aunt in California.”  It never occurred to me why until much later when it was acknowledged that she had a child. And I can remember how inferior I felt when it seemed that all my acquaintances had such perfect families and all the kids were getting college scholarships to the schools of their choice, etc. etc. etc.  It was only later that I heard (and not from my friends) about drug problems, eating disorders, jail time, etc. in the lives of these same acquaintances.  However, when I did hear about it years later, it was in the form of gossip, though, and not real confrontation or edifying, transformative discussion/interaction.

How and where do you go for help when it seems that yours is the only family that is struggling?  How do you learn to help others when you have never witnessed help in action?

So just in case you are wondering because I know how compassionate you are, I am really okay now.  But I suffered depression for way too many years of my life because I refused to acknowledge it and seek help.  I had no example, no precedent.  It just wasn’t done.  And in that depression I made lots of serious mistakes.  I have learned lots of lessons from my experience.  I have learned to forgive myself; I have learned to forgive others.  I am more compassionate because I know that no one is immune from similar struggles, no matter how put-together they look and act.

The Bible tells us that a hypocrite is someone who puts on a mask and pretends to be something he is not.  “If anyone thinks they are something when they are not, they deceive themselves” (Galatians 6:3). Ephesians 4:25 reminds us that as members of one body, we believers should be honest with ourselves and with each other.

So circling back to the beginning—I cannot begin to express how transformative it has been for me to work alongside you who have been so open about your own life struggles. Your honesty and your life story have encouraged me.  You are strong, you are courageous, you are loving, you are my heroes of the faith.

I thank you.  I hope you know what you mean to me.

Blessings,

Judy